Is it worth it?

Dear World,

So, life is hard. Shit happens. We do stuff we're not proud of and we wish that things didn't happen to us. So... how do we deal with it? I'm still trying to answer this question for myself. Does God provide? He has definitely shown himself to me in brief past moments, but is that a real relationship? Brief moments from a loving and caring father, followed by extended silence and waiting. That's almost torture. But is it worth it? It would take work to be able to hear more from God. Long, hard, patient, work. Lots of reading, and praying, and waiting for an answer. I want desperately to hear back from Him, but I'm too scared that it won't happen. I don't want to be let down again... but, in the long run, at the end, what's waiting for me... is it worth it?

...

Love Always,
Maddie